Being single is often presented as a flaw. You are considered to be a person difficult to deal with or merely a loser. It makes no surprise that such kind of attitude gives us the fear of being lonely. That fear grows when you understand that you are almost 30 or over 30 and still single. You look at your friends or former classmates and discover that most of them either having steady partners or got married. Meanwhile, your main accomplishments are either having several date-mates a year or just remaining single all the time. It feels like there must be a club for you to join, where every new member when presenting himself, says “Hi, I’m 30 and single!”. But is anything wrong with being single at 30? Let’s figure out.
Reasons for Being Single at 30
Before you start searching for articles “30 and Single: What to Do?”, you need to figure out whether you are having a problem or not. In order to do so, we offer you to check out the most common reasons for being 30 and single.
1. Still Looking For The One
There is quite a big possibility that you are still single because you are waiting for your perfect match. Think about all of your partners, were they the best? If so, then probably you simply don’t know what you want. But if you can say that all of your previous partners were the second best, then you can simply relax, as you are not having any problems, you’re just continue searching for your ideal partner.
2. You Cherish Your Alone-Time
Now, forget for a moment everything that the society and your friends tell you, and ask yourself one simple question: “Do you really want to be in a relationship?”. Because of the pressure of the society, we rarely allow our own needs to be taken into consideration. Maybe you really enjoy being alone, and you don’t feel like you are really ready to share your life with somebody else? If so, then take your time, as there is no need to be in a hurry.
- Low Self-Esteem
What is one of the most common reasons for being single? Right, the low self-esteem. You may say “Come one, I’m not a teenager anymore…”, but that doesn’t mean that you overcame it. Sometimes, people continue to think that they are worthless throughout their whole lives. So, most likely you the reason for your being still single lies in the fact that you simply think that you don’t deserve to have a partner. Remember that club from the beginning of the article? It’s time to think about joining it.
4. Unhealthy Attractions
Low self-esteem may result in choosing the wrong partners as well. You may have a subconscious idea that you don’t deserve a partner with whom you can build a healthy relationship. Most likely, you are choosing hysterical perfectionists who are bound to leave you, as that is what you really want…subconsciously. You know, forget about that club, it is better to visit a shrink.
5. Rule Making
Another reason for remaining single is that you are a control rule-making-control-freak. “My girlfriend must obey me!” is your regular catch-phrase for a date? Well, then there is no surprise that nobody wants to date you. You need to reconsider your views because, honestly, neither club nor shrink would be able to help you.