Here is my dilemma: I am a 28-year-old banker in Yaounde. Nkeng (real name withheld) is a year older than me and we have been dating since our university days. Two years after we graduated my bestfriend’s dad linked me up with the job I now have and Nkeng on the other hand decided to go back to school and study IT after numerous rejected job applications.
Nkeng and I live together, so while he was studying, I paid for everything, that is rents, bills, food and I also clothed him. Nkeng finished his IT studies and decided to start his own company. The company provides IT services to other businesses, build websites and applications. Business is not going very well so I am the one that is still paying for everything!
Last month when I visited my mother in the village, she told me I wasn’t getting any younger and that from all indications Nkeng is not ready for marriage, as he can’t even look after himself. My mother told me she understands the love we share but I should be selfish at this point and think about my age. She said Nkeng is a man and can marry at anytime but as for me when the time is gone it is gone. She advised me to leave him and look for a man who was serious and ready for marriage.
When I came back home I told Nkeng about wanting to marry and start a family and he quickly changed the topic. I also advised him to take a full time job that he had been offered by a company he had a temporary contract with. He refused, “I am an entrepreneur and I don’t want to work for anyone full time,” he said.
I love Nkeng so much but like my mother said I am running out of time. I am torn between leaving him and staying together until he finds his place in society.
What is your advise Ebisco readers?
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